The Prudent Hedonist

I don’t mean to cause any unnecessary alarm, but I might be in trouble.

You see, something…happened…this past weekend. Something that I’ve been trying to avoid for quite some time. Something I’m not proud of. Something that I know in my soul is wrong and dirty and the first step down the path to madness. Something that I never, ever should have done.

It’s true, the whole weekend was full of potentially dangerous activities. But I had survived the 12 course Chinese New Year foodgasm at Peninsula on Friday — with flying colours even — the food (and company, of course) was excellent. Even the two hours of Rock Band that I’d subjected myself to afterwards left me unscathed.

On Saturday, I was reckless enough to brave the weekend Mall of America crowds in order to partake in knitting geekery – but no pointy sticks or acrylic skeins got their hooks into me. My cocksure assault on Grand Ave at midday also failed to generate casualties, and my tickets to see a true Canadian hero perform were successfully secured. Maybe it was then that I started to let my guard down? The fact that tequila, even if it was the irreproachable Patron Anejo, was my chosen libation for the evening would seem to attest to the fact that my defenses against Very Bad Ideas were weakened.

It wasn’t until Sunday when the real breakdown in reason began. Too much time trying to beat Super Samurai on basic. Too many star bits forcefed to too many bulimic Lumas. Can I really use these horrors as my excuse? No — what I’ve done was inexcusable. My only salvation now lies here, in this digital confessional, and in you, its readers. I must come clean, repent, lay bare my shame… but how?

How can one regain trust in herself after she has created a character in World of Warcraft, played it through multiple levels, and LIKED IT?